"Why did I ask her to be in my wedding?!" Have you ever asked that question and want to know how to eliminate a bridesmaid? Well, according to Miss Manners this is how and when to rid yourself of a "bridesmaid from hell". But, be careful girls. There is a warning for you, the bride, in her advice.
"If it was that your friend must accept the honor of waiting on you hand and foot while surrendering control over her own time and money and wardrobe, it was an illegitimate deal. Those terms exist only in the minds of brides who have worked themselves into a state of self-inflation that has rendered them thoughtless toward their own closest friends. Miss Manners is not going to help you fire a friend for refusing to turn into an indentured servant.
However, if your bridesmaid has been telling you that you can do better than marrying the gentleman in question and that she hopes to make it to the wedding but can't promise, it is she who has broken the deal. In that case, you could say, "I don't think you realized what you were getting into when you kindly took this on, and I can see it's becoming a burden to you. You know how dear you are to me, and I'd be just as happy to have you at the wedding without your having to go through all the business of being a bridesmaid."